Updated: May 19
adjective: marginalized; adjective: marginalised
1. (of a person, group, or concept) treated as insignificant or peripheral.
"members of marginalized cultural groups"
I use this word quite often; it has a familiar feel for me, like how some might feel about the word home. I use the word "Marginalized" without negative connotation; I am, in fact, grateful for being marginalized. Now, it has taken 47 years for me to feel like this, but this is the general feeling I have about being marginalized my entire life.
If you fit in whatever part of the time you live, you are not forced to view life differently, and simple pleasures are just that, simple pleasures. For marginalized people, we are left pondering; why? Why do I not fit, and why do others? Why am I considered less than, and people instantly consider me less than until they get to know me? Why do people need to know my mind, thoughts, and perception, and what I stand for before I am given the respect that others get without a word said?
Now I said I am grateful I am marginalized, and that is the truth, but I did not always feel this way. Parents that have never been forced into marginalization don't understand what an incredibly hard life it can be. Being transgender is not only forcing your child into a world of being less than you are forcing them into the 1 part of society that is marginalized, hated, and consider the biggest LESS THAN community in the world. It's not puppies and rainbows; I can guarantee you that.
"Oh look, yup, she/he is transgender. I can tell, can you? It's the voice you can always tell with the voice!"
If you love a marginalized person, they matter, to you, others, not so much. Have you ever noticed that people that are homophobic, racist, or any other form of hate are staunch within their belief system until it touches their family?
Parents that are medically transitioning their children, I believe, believe they are doing their children a favor, accepting them early and aggressively. Anyone that disagrees is just bigots. When it comes to the love we have for children, it distorts our reasoning and decision making, and it's evident as a medically transitioned man.
Something to ponder; as a parent of a trans-identifying child. I say identifying because the odds are against them being transgender and in need of medical transition. When you decide to transition a child medically, you are signing, sealing, and delivering them to a life locked into being marginalized, locked into the medical system, and locked into a life of being the ultimate "Guessing Game to everyone, but their family." Think about that; you love your children, but 99.99% of society doesn't care about them …and just an FYI – Neither do these medical professionals that are pushing you, in the end; it's about money, don't question that.
You are handing them off to adulthood with medical issues, being marginalized, and being the world's guessing game without any proof that (A) medical transitioning is safe (B) that it fixes anything. We have not been transitioning people like we are now for a long enough period to have any validating documentation. Look at the studies the medical industry is giving you, 1-3 years analyzing something as dramatic as swapping dominant hormones on wrong defined chromosomes is serious business people. You are stamping on their forehead, "Transgender," and to you, they matter, but to others, they don't.
Another guessing game you are playing is if they are resilient enough to have a positive effect from being marginalized. Some of the most significant people that lived were marginalized, but what about the rest? How many did not have the resilience to benefit from this angle of seeing the world this way? You are guessing that they have enough resilience to not only survive but to prosper. You are not saving them from anything I guarantee you that. Are your children strong enough to be turned into adulthood with medical issues for life, being marginalized, being the world's new guessing game? You don't know, and it's irresponsible to think you do.
The puppies and rainbows of transitioning have to outweigh the other side of transitioning; shall we say the other side is like being dragged by a truck from a noose around your neck. Which one wins in the end, puppies and rainbows or neck noose drags from behind a truck? That's right; you don't know because you are not in their head, and you have no idea how they will deal with being marginalized and the difficulties that come along with it.
Parents you are guessing on which side will weigh more, puppies and rainbows or neck nooses, and you are allowing entities that have enormous financial gain to manipulate you to throw the dice. Make no mistake; you are throwing the dice on your children's life without any real, long term studies on experimental procedures. You don't believe me, look up medical malpractice
cases for transgender surgeons or physicians. You won't find any because they do not have guidelines for transgender health care, and they love it this way.
One scenario it benefits.
"Yes, mam, totally safe, and if you don't transition your kids, they will commit suicide."
Another scenario that I lived personally,
"Aw, sorry, Mr. Newgent, terribly sorry you are sick for the rest of your life, but transgender health doesn't have a baseline for care, nothing to compare it to, it's experimental, I didn't know that. To take your case we would have to hire physicians and scientist to conduct studies and it would cost millions of millions of dollars. Again, sorry, but it's not financially feasible."
I'm not trying to squash anything; I'm trying to save your children.
How do you know what side weighs better for your child? How much resilience do they have multiplied and divide by puppies and rainbows with being dragged behind trucks with nooses? Ummm, at what point is the benefit, oh that's right we don't fucking know.
But what we do know is that transgender youth have a significant amount of mental illness. If dosing these kids with massive amounts of hormones that induce psychological war isn't enough, we are guessing on their resilience of being marginalized for life and if it will benefit them or cause them to blow their heads off. Now, tie this neatly in a bow, including medical issues for life, being the pun of the "Guessing game people all love," having to prove their worth from the ground up from every person they ever meet for their entire life. So, maybe just maybe taking kids with mental illness issues and pouring on being marginalized along with mind altering hormones and medical problems might not be the RIGHT thing to do.
Take a second to think of all the things your kids were convinced about five years ago, Santa; Mutant Ninja Turtles were real, kind of makes you feel stupid if you ponder the idea that an 11 – 12 -13 -14 -15 -16 knows who they will want to be at 25, I can guarantee they don't know so what makes you think these medical professionals do after talking with your kids for a couple of hours. They don't know yet, let them grow into this decision as an adult. Because in the end this is a decision that needs to be made by an adult about their own life. No one has the right to push this life even if their kids are convinced it's the right thing to do.
Parent up – Kinda like a man up – Time to parent up.
Parents you don’t have the right to make this decision for your children.